We finished full Iron man on September 25th, and it is truly like I'm dreaming, but I wake up and realize that it is all true. One Sunday, my daughter brought home a scripture verse from church, "With God ALL things are possible" - Matthew 19:26. Upon my last weeks of training, this scripture spoke to me in so many ways, but mostly in knowing that He is in full control of our lives and our minutes daily as we go throughout each and every single day. Two weeks from event day, I had somehow dislocated a rib and six days from the event I was struck with strep throat and a massive ear infection.  We ourselves may be weak and in doubt but when He has set forth a path for us to take he will continually watch over us and is always there. On the morning of the race, I cannot say that I wasn't nervous, but I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be. Although there were challenges, I knew it was God's plan for me to be at that event start, but was still in awe with the fact that I myself was there getting ready to do an Iron man that day.  My emotions truly overwhelmed me the day before the race as my family came in town for the event. I was so very blessed to have them surrounding me in love and prayers the night before.  I wept like a baby as I felt His great love and was so overcome with emotion as I reflected upon the past 9.5 years with all those who had been a part of this long journey.

As I woke early on that event morning, I thought about how hard the training was, how great God was to allow me to wake this morning to attempt this today, about the scriptures which were learned upon those long training days and thanked Him for my family, friends, tri4Him team and all those who have assisted to get me here.  I said previously that “we finished full Ironman,” I could not be here without God, my family, friends and the tri4Him team support throughout all the years past!  The calls, text message, face book messages and emails showed this as they poured in on Friday afternoon. 

After the praise, worship and prayer at 5:30 a.m. race morning, I was even more at ease and some of the problems which arose that morning were resolved after turning to Him in prayer.  I should just mentioned that I miss placed my bike computer and to not have that to help pace, regulate averages, track mileage and all else that our bike computers do would have been horrible.  This praise and worship time was one of the most amazing aspects of the day as we sang Everlasting Love and Have Faith.  We listened to the pastor talk about perseverance, praying and encouraging one another throughout the day. We were reminded to pray for one another when we saw each of these 30 Christian athletes out and about the course that day. After this most inspirational verbal devotional, I put thoughts of anxiety and worry out of my mind, I rested in the assurance that all things are working for a higher goodness beyond myself. At that point I was fully aware that this wouldn’t be any exertion of my willpower but of God’s strength working through me.

Although it was highly suggested by the race directors to turn in our run and bike transition bags on Friday, I had a feeling that I wasn't supposed to hand them over and just felt uneasy about it.  So I took them back to the hotel and rummaged through them. I forgot to put my inhaler in my run bag and my socks for the bike leg. Forgetting those two simple items could have kept me from finishing the race.

The first loop of the swim went great; although much slower than I wanted. As I looped around to head out for the second 1.25 mile loop of the swim, my once right shattered ankle locked up at 1.5 miles in and my entire foot and leg cramped up. I attempted to continue swimming, but the cramp was just too bad and my ankle was locked into a 90 degree position. By this time, I was moaning so very loudly that another swimmer slowed to a treading water position asking, "Are you alright?" Still in an agonizing voice I said, "My whole leg is cramping. Keep going buddy do your best!" He kept going. At that time, I saw three kayaks coming near, one behind, one beside and one from the front. My thoughts at that time were, "This crazy leg; the ankle has been shattered, the hamstring has had surgery, I deal with post surgical compartment syndrome in the lower right extremity, tore meniscus in the knee and now this!" So I flipped over onto my back trying a different position to work out the cramp. Not to mention that I do not know how to do the back stroke or any other stroke except for the freestyle.

I'm a true New Mexican and water is for fishing rather than swimming.  Unfortunately, I was still in great pain, and my leg just wouldn't stop cramping. I looked at the shore and thought to myself, “I'm done”.  At that moment, it was like my grandma spoke to me just as if she were alive, "Whatch gonna do… quit?"  She said that often to all her kids and grand kids.  I knew there was shallow water nearby so I began swimming in the opposite direction than I needed to be going. I got myself over to the shallow area. I was there for about 2-3 minutes and then saw one of the kayakers coming closer, so motioned for him to stop. At the time, I was crying out in prayer asking God to make the cramping subside and not come back. I then put my right heel upon the ground and rolled onto the ball of my foot and the ankle unlocked.  The leg cramping was gone, and I swam my fastest and easiest 1 mile ever.  It was as if God had His hand under me keeping me afloat, and then I arrived at the shore. I couldn't have been happier to reach the ramp and finish the swim. Just moments before, I thought my day was over. 

Then it was on to the bike. I never did see my family coming out of the water. Wet suit off, jersey on, socks on, glasses and helmet, let’s go!!!! Still no family, but I expected to be in the water much longer than I was.  God is so GREAT!  So off on two wheels I went. After the first 28 miles, I passed my beloved family and other spectators near the turn around.  Seeing all of them just tended to empower me that much more.  Knowing that those who made the great lengths to drive 11 hours to watch me showed me so much love and in doing my best would ever show them my appreciation.  As always, after a swim longer than an hour, my belly was in a knot and it hurt so badly I couldn't get comfortable in the aero bars on my bike. So I did what I could, steady and easy for a little less than 7 hours to complete the 112 mile cycling trek. I felt great joy as I observed the beautiful sights around me; the trees, the animals, the blue sky and seeing the love within the athlete’s hearts as they secretly encouraged and interacted with one another out beyond others eye sight.  It was so very special about being out on the road with so many other crazed people who were doing this event, especially after the year of solitude.  During this time I was experiencing the richness of God’s bounty, it wasn’t anything I understood as I was also experiencing the greatest physical pain which I ever had.  The opportunity which we all took to attempt the distance of this endurance event and being out doing the activities that we all share doing was such a blessing.  The bike course was more challenging than I expected, but we had trained on much harder hills, so the bike really felt like a breeze and felt like I fueled and conserved enough energy for at least the first 13 miles of the run. 

I'd encourage others as I road down the hills and chat with others as I went up the hills. I often switched positions with a guy, and I'd climb up passing him going up and he'd fly by me going down.  Triathlets just love gravity and the science behind what we do, from pacing, to gravity, to nutrition, energy conservation, aero dynamics, body position, fully in faith and so much more. Guess that is why I love the sport and if any one person every truly perfects it all then I want to spend a day with them talking about it and a week training with them.

I was grateful for the BIG 100 Cookie Dough endurance bar I found a few weeks earlier at a local gas station. It was past 10 am as I had not eaten since the cold waffles, yogurt and banana earlier that morning at 3:30 am.  The tasty gooey half melted cookie dough bar was the closest thing to real food in several hours.  Granted the hammer chocolate chip bars are great nutrition, but at some point in this long day comfort food was greatly needed.  Plus after a certain point everything I ate tasted like dirt, probably due to the lack of saliva even after the almost 180 oz of hydration fluids.  As I rounded the last true corner of the bike leg, I heard the familiar voice of our beloved Jann Caver who was my son’s kindergarten teacher.  What a beautiful blessing to see her there as she also cheered on her own great cousin, Edward.  The bike leg was finished and really seemed easy and I could have pushed so much harder but didn't know what or how I'd feel on the run. 

That morning, I decided since I was so close to the changing tents to just keep my “bike to run” bag at my bike transition area which worked out great. No searching for who or where my bag was when I came in. I had to put up my bike and would be there anyways.  I took my very sweet time in the” bike to run” transition. It was hot out there on the bike, and my bike gage read 99 degrees at times. The shade inside the tent felt great and it allowed me to take a moment and just prepare mentally, relax and refresh a little before heading out for the last 26 miles. My stomach was still in a knot, but off I went for the first loop. The fuel belt around my waist was pushing inward and causing greater discomfort, so before I crossed the timing mat for the very first time on the run, I dropped my fuel belt wondering if this was the decision that would break me.  After I dropped it, I just realized how much extra weight I was dragging along those first 6.5 miles of the run. Normally it didn’t seem that heavy but upon this dayit felt like a 5 pound weight had been taken off me.  After I crossed the run mat, my husband asked, "How are you feeling babe?" I only had enough energy to shake my head to the left and right as I continued to focus upon each step.  On the second loop, I saw many coming in from their 2ND run loop terribly exhausted and worn out from either not fueling correctly on the bike, going too fast on the bike or simply just exhaustion, so I tried to encourage and pray for as many of them as I could.  I knew many of them had done the same for me on that long 112 mile bike ride we just finished minutes ago. At this point we all held a great humbleness within with all the circumstances which we already experienced and all that we knew was still ahead of us.

Before I crossed the run mat on the second loop, I stopped and changed my socks since the left foot was totally soaked because of the iced sponges and the ice I was placing into the back of my shirt and pants due to the heat and lack of shade.  At most aid stations, I stopped to fill up my water bottle with ice water and grabbed a glass of Gatorade. By this time, I simply could no longer drink the Hammer drink which had sustained me all day up to this point.  The ice water was great to drink but it felt even better squirting it on my head.  The dry socks felt so comforting and many who know me know I love my socks. It is just a thing with me being the simplistic person that I am and having the numerous foot issues with shattering my ankle at a young age. 

After I crossed the timing mat the second time on the run again my husband pondered how I was doing, but this time the response was a smile and a semi celebration knowing there were only two more run loops before the finish.  After I crossed the timing mat the second time on the run again my husband pondered how I was doing, but this time the response was a smile and a semi celebration knowing there were only two more run loops before the finish.  Again, the cheers and encouragement of both familiar and unfamiliar voices made me smile within.  Many out on the run course were getting more and more tired and I could read it on their faces, but when these cheers came it fed us like a home cooked meal.  Their spirits blessed us even if it was a simple smile or a clap as we could almost feel that they could see our internal pain and total well-being after being out on the course for almost half the day.

One of the Christian athletes, who were poking me at the praise & worship earlier that morning, came up behind me and poked me on this loop of the run. He said, "I saw you back there and just wanted to tell you I prayed for you. You will finish strong."  We spent this whole loop passing back and forth, chatting and encouraging one another. This loop seemed a little easier as the knot in my stomach was subsiding. When I returned back lakeside to see the beautiful reflection which God has painted for us within the sunset, I could only think of His grace, mercy and the beauty which he continually gives us. How many days I saw His reflection while out training the past year. How many times His reflection made me stop and pause to thank Him.  What a reminder in this reflective proof of His love for us, and how at awe I am with Him during these beautiful moments and in daily living.   

I saw the lighthouse many times during the day, but with it now being in front God's beauty it reminded me of all that is often in front of us during each day which we so willingly look past when His signs are visibly there already. The pink and light orange filled the sky and turned a bright orange as I looked upon the sailboats on the peaceful waters radiating His gorgeous reflection.  Thoughts crossed my mind of the occurrence that morning and how merciful God was.   God had certainly surrounded us all day with his enduring love, strength and power.  I believe this third run loop was my fastest as I seemed to be able to jog most of it due to relief of my stomach pain. Yet, it quickly returned on loop four as the sun faded and the darkness set in. The florescent necklace wrapped around my neck continually reminded me of His light and His love guiding us through the darkness as it pounded upon my chest.  I was ever so careful upon those ever so dark many areas not to twist and ankle or to go crashing upon another participant.  There were so many volunteers and family out on that dark course cheering each of us on was such a great blessing.  The simple “good job,” “keep that pace,” “looking good,” “way to go” were such music upon our ears.  The encouragement helped place our next step upon the ground.  

Coming back toward the lake after that fourth loop was an awesome feeling and was almost like those last three loops of the run I was on auto pilot just pacing the last 25 miles.  As I pressed my watch, I was in disbelief of what it read, the distance behind me and knowing that in just a little while we would be finishing this race.  

Around a corner from the darkness I see lights, tents, and there is the home stretch, but it seemed like forever reaching the final mat. There is my sister-in-law, a crowd at the finish, arms waving, people screaming, clapping and just cheering.  Many of the same spectators spoke sweet words and often great words of knowledge "You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you!" Phil 4:13 So many times throughout the day I heard His beautiful words filling my ears. "You do not grow weary." "God is with you."  "Your jersey is my favorite" and so many more just wonderful comments not to praise me, but to ultimately praise HIM!  I was overwhelmed by the whole experience that day and yet again in awe of Him who lead the way and the love which was shared along all those mile.  I reached that finish sooner than I thought that I would.  I turned around to look at my family, it was sweet to see their faces light up in the darkness as I finished.  My head spun and blackness overtook my vision. I had given it my all this day.  I gave everything and more, but it wasn't me who did it.  Rather, God carried me through the day.  I believe His light shined on this day and it was His strength, His power, His might and His will that my body crossed the finish line! It was for HIS GLORY alone!!!

Just like with anything, when things get hard we must keep our eyes on HIM as He will lead the way. That scripture my daughter brought home will always remain so very true - "With HIM ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!"  Matthew 19:26.  I never thought that I would be able to do something such as a full Iron man and it has been a long time coming as I worked through all of the physical ailments for so many years, along with fear that often fills my head and by truly trusting faithfully in Him and not my physical capabilities is the utmost knowledge of that finish line.

To put doubt aside from the mind and rely on what dwells my heart leads me to have faith in what He is doing and the direction which He leads us so that our lives shine His glory 4HIM!!!! The day wasn't just about finishing Iron man as so many may think, but it is truly about the full journey that we experienced to get to that final destination, the things we saw, the things we felt, the people we met, those who guided, encouraged, prayed and often put us in our place during the long haul.  It was about God, The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit which fills our hearts, the passion which He gives us to touch others hearts so that their heart and life too may be changed.

I found myself in the medic tent shaking uncontrollably, iv in my arm and my entire body cramping.  A guy who I saw throughout the day came into the medic tent some time after me.  Knowing how he was suffering throughout the day, I encouraged and prayed for him on that run route. I'm totally covered up in a blanket trying to deal with my own massive physical ailments and keep my own family calm.  I turned to him and congratulated him as he says, "Hey tri4HIM right?" I said, "Yes, I'm proud of you brother way to go!" His reply, "Thanks for everything out there today."  There was a seed planted and I have a feeling if he doesn't already know Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior he soon will........! I know so many others were impacted to and hopefully not by just me but the rest of the team too.  It is about our life journey as a whole and about reaching His ETERNITY at GOD'S Gate - I can only wonder who has gone before me waiting to welcome me at that gate. I can only hope that we all meet there one day and we have the hugest celebration in His glorious music!!!!!  September 25Th at 9:11 pm God finished this Iron man in 13:56:08, but more importantly marked the 100Th endurance event for His eternal glory as each of those small journeys incorporated to reaching this “Mount Everest” which I never thought possible or even fathomed was possible because of the weakness within this body.  I am pleased to say there is no doubt that I’m going the rest of this journey with HIM and whatever He sets forth, His ultimate plan for my life I will go!!!!  

I had huge doubt about my own physical abilities, but with true faith in Him may I always remember to continue being obedient to Him.  In doing so, I  know that He will show me even greater plans for my life and do that ultimate something I thought was simply unthinkable.   The sacrificial love during all the training the past 9.5 years is nothing even close to comparable to His sacrifice for me upon that rugged cross.......!  There is something amazing about going "beyond yourself" and doing something you never thought of doing in His strength, will and power.  There was something wonderful about hearing His love through the voices of His children as His words enlighten your heart during utmost weariness. It was like someone putting gas in a car to keep it going.  What a blessing they all were throughout the entire weekend.  There was something that we all experienced together on September 25Th regardless if you were in the event or one of our most precious cheerleaders on the course. It is an experience that will dwell within our hearts and minds forever.  Many of us believe that our angels who have gone before us may have helped carry us to the finish upon His will.  I know I felt it on that day!!!!!  Many were His angels here on earth and others who still watch over us. Life is has been revealed to me in such new heights in being obedient to Him, even when He leads me to do things I feel are not capable. I always knew it, but there is a difference between knowing and experiencing the Spirit being the center of every need, physically, emotionally or when filling the heart with all it needs during the day regardless of the activity or trial within any given day.  This Spirit is the infinite breath that supplies us with oxygen to sustain brain, body and supplies us with energy in order for our very hearts to beat.  It is the very presence and power of God within me allowing His to work through me for His greater good! 

On Sunday I awoke still shaking uncontrollably, still energized by the endorphins and the realization of the previous day events.  Upon this morning I was able to relax and enjoy being surrounding by my family who endured the long days heat the day before.  I was sowing seeds of peace within love by the faith, joy and wisdom of the memories which encompassed my thoughts and showed through actions.  His power was actively present.  The doubt and fears which had been ever so felt were gone and His influence within my life were incorporated within mind knowledge of knowing all things truly are possible. 

On our trip home, a song by Ricky Skaggs came on, “Someone’s Praying for Me”, and it was a very appropriate song to end the weekend on such a beautiful and cool Sunday.   During training, Newsboys Impossible consistently rhymed in my ears and another of their songs touched my heart upon our arrival, “On Bend Knees.”  Then there are the Chad Spriggs favorites “How Lord,” ‘Set Free,” Faithfully Freash,” “I Am is Holy,” “You Offer Me” from his You offere Me cd his beloved wife sent me.  Chad is a friend who works in the ministry in Albuquerque, New Mexico and who shows His love in song.  I grew up with his wife, Deanna, at El Paso Natural Gas Plant B in New Mexico from a very young age since 3^rd grade.  Another one of those blessings whom I saw Christ in some time ago, but didn’t understand that at the time of being lost.  Had it not been for people like her and a very special basketball coach it would have taken Him much longer to reach this young and very confused child.  I know this is why God has lead me to start racing so long ago and pushing the limits in physical endurance to make that impact as they did.

Even ten after the event, I’m experiencing heaven right now and thanking God for the experience to be in obedience to Him and am filled with great peace being in unity for His plan and purpose in this life.  I do not know where He will lead me next, but I know that regardless He will reach great heights farther beyond me. 

Camille M. Smouse

10-5-2010